Are Tops Going Extinct in the Gay Community?

Are Tops Going Extinct in the Gay Community?


The gay community is becoming overpopulated with bottoms!

I’m the kind of guy who likes to try every flavor in the ice cream bar, ok? Trust me honey in my life I’ve been on top, bottom, sideways and upside down – I have strong opinions on all. But lately it seems like the gay community is overpopulated with bottoms and power bottoms. Have tops gone extinct?

Where are all the tops, I ask. If you don’t think this is an issue, then you’re probably a top (or “prefer” to top), which means you’re more likely not to have an issue getting laid nowadays. Not that I need to worry about getting some, but it seems like my sex life lately has been a broken record. All these pesky bottoms out there want to bottom, but no one is willing to step onto the pitcher’s mount.

With so many bottoms running ramped, it’s enough to make even the proudest of tops go versatile. They’ve quickly learned that bottoms get the better end of the deal, so they slowly put the “vers” label on their profiles. Eventually they learn bottoming is God’s gift to mankind and as time goes by, they’re full fledged bottoms with a capital B.

Is there a reason why gay guys are beginning to bottom more often? If you ask me, it might be the growing acceptance of LGBT culture, which, as a result, diminished much of our internalized homophobia and the sexual associations attached to it.

A 2003 issue of The Journal of Sex Research reported that tops are more likely than both bottoms and versatiles to reject a gay self-identity and to have had sex with a woman in the past three months. Tops also manifested higher internalized homophobia. Keep in mind, this was twelve years ago: Will and Grace was in its fifth season and the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that gay sex was legal in every U.S. state (Lawrence v. Texas).

Times have certainly changed in the last decade. Hookup apps are a part of everyday life now. When they first came out I remember people scoffing at the idea; now we don’t even bat an eyelash. Gay guys are exposed to so much sex talk. Combine that with the growing acceptance of identity, lifestyle and fetish, it’s no wonder gay guys are finally letting their wall down when it comes to bottoming.

Mind you, there are plenty of guys who don’t like to bottom. God bless them. The gay world needs to have tops who actually love doing it, but I can’t help but wonder how many versatile bottoms or even power bottoms are sacrificing their preferences simply because their outnumbered.

I’m all for experimentation, honey. We can’t get enough of it in my opinion, but dammit what’s a gay gotta do to get some decent power tops in the house?

I remember what it was like in my twenties. It was the power bottoms who got all the attention. Back then bottoming was associated as womanly or emasculating, so fewer guys were willing to do it out of fear. But things are different now. The gays used to flock towards a sexy bottom boy on the dance floor, now they seem to be eyeing the tops. Come to find out there are only a few to be spotted.

Are tops going extinct? God I hope not. If anything, I hope that gay guys everywhere will learn to be more versatile in their ways. It is, after all, the happiest of roles anyone can do. Sticking to one particular position your whole life is noble and all, but stepping out of your comfort zone is so rewarding.

I used to tell tops all the time to start bottoming. Now it seems I’m demanding more bottoms to start topping. I’m definitely in the twilight zone.

By Blake Michaels